HIIII!!! My friend Alex just posted this on deviantart and I couldn't help but put it here! It's a really random yaoi story that alex, kiara, and I made around midnight last night. I made up the names and we took turns writing. Eventually it ended up like this.

To Zack: I do not regret putting you in this. It was too good a chance to pass up.XDD Plus I was drunk. (And we all know that makes up for all the craziest shit I do)

-There once was a man named Suzy who lived in a beach house. In the middle of the night, pirates would come and visit this rich man. He had foretold this would happen so he hid in a chamber. And there, to his surprise, he found Joel.

“Hey hey hey! You’re looking pretty lonely, sweety.” Joel grinned slyly.

Suzy frowned, somewhat scared. “B-but I’m a man.”

“Well…I think I can deal with that.” Joel grabbed Suzy and tied him to the wall with ropes. Suzy’s eyes widened at his long-time best friend standing in front of him dressed in tight black leather with whips.

“When the hell did you change clothes?!” Suzy yelled, shocked at the change in appearance.

“I have had practice, so it only comes naturally like this.” Joel replied. Suzy gazed at him, not quite getting his answer. Joel approached, reaching for him.

“Don’t come near me!” Suzy screamed at him.

“Come now.” Joel cooed. “Be a good boy.”

“No! I don’t wanna!” The captured man thrashed against his bonds. Joel slammed his hands beside the other man’s head against the wall.

“Well I’m gonna have to teach you then…” He said seductively.

“But I’m only twelve years old!” Suzy protested.

“When it comes to my love, you turn five years older with experience. Don’t worry. Come here.” He grabbed Suzy’s pants and unzipped them slowly.

Suzy yelped. “What are you grabbing?!” Joel gave him a confused look.

“Your pants?”

“What pants?” Both men’s heads turned to the newcomer Zack.

“I own you you two, my sexy beasts.” Zack said as he walked in naked. Suzy gasped as he took in Zack’s form, feeling something stir in his nonexistent pants.

“Go away Zack.” Joel said scathingly. “Can’t you see Suzy and I are in the middle of something?”

“No we’re not!” Suzy yelled as he gnawed on his bonds in hope of escaping.

Zack scowled and turned to Joel. “He’s mine you bastard!” He grabbed Suzy- now free from his bonds- and snapped a pair of fuzzy pink handcuffs on his wrists. “My uke!” He yelled possessively.

“Just because I have whipped cream and an uncomfortable G-string doesn’t mean you can take Suzy! You’re just jealous because it looks sexier on me!” Joel protested.

“Let go of me!” Suzy kicked Zack and started to run up the stairs only to be confronted by the pirates he ran into the chamber for.

“Arrg!” The bearded pirate growled. “Look at that booty mates!” Suzy’s eyes widened when he heard two voices from behind him.


“What?” Both voices yelled and Suzy turned around to greet the dark aura of his two suiters.

Joel grinned evilly, cracking his knuckles. “What did you say about my Suzy?” He asked menacingly.

The pirate frowned at this. “That he was fine booty.” Then he threw a pineapple at the man’s face.

“OW!” Joel yelled and flew through the wall, much to Suzy’s shock.

“Holy crap!” He yelled but Zack ignored the scene.

“No one talks about my uke that way.” He growled and jumped at the pirate.

The pirate went down easily in one hit. Zack huffed, out of breath. “Oh god.” He muttered. “That was a tough battle.” Suzy sweat dropped.

“It was only one hit.” He said.

“Yes…” Joel agreed, just as much out of breath as Zack. “One tough battle.” Both men were covered in scrapes and bruises, blood trailing down their lips.

Suzy gaped at them. “Bu-but it was just-”

“HEY!” One of the pirate crew yelled. “You can’t just do that to our captain!”

“Yeah!” The pirate captain stood, perfectly fine. “You can’t do that to our captain!” Suzy’s eyes popped.

“Wait wasn’t he-”

“I can’t take much more.” Zack gasped, wiping his lip.

“We have to come to an agreement.” Joel nodded. They turned to the captain and smiled. “How about…” Joel started.

“We settle for a…” Zack counted the crew. “twenty-seven-some?” The pirate raised an eyebrow.

“Interesting…” He turned to his crew. “How about it maties?” The crowd cheered.

“N-no!” Suzy protested as all the men turned on him. “We can’t just-” All the men jumped at once at him.
=-=-=-=
Suzy sat up in shock, sweat pouring down his face. He huffed and gazed around the black room, recovering from his dream.

He lay back down with a smile. “Whew.” He breathed a sigh of relief. “It was just a dream.”


A hand wrapped around his waist. Suzy started and widened his eyes at the naked Joel next to him. “What was…?” The man murmured.

Another hand wrapped around him from his other side and Suzy turned to him in shock. “Yes…What was?” Zack asked, half asleep.

Suzy wanted to scream. And he was about to too when the door opened. In stepped the pirate captain, stripped naked with a glass of water.

“Arrg. What’d I miss?” He asked walking over to the bed. Then Suzy screamed.

~Owari

By: Alex, Kiara, and Alexis


So yah. Here it is. I can't help but feel reminded of Bobobo-bobobo-bo with all the randomness.